The power of words

I recently came across a debate on the use of the derogatory term” tranny” between RuPaul and a now transgender Carmen Carrera.
I will now show my ignorance because I am not afraid to be a fool.

RuPaul

I grew up seeing Rupaul as this gorgeous model that was tall and had a wonderful figure. He made the song  supermodel and made me believe I could be a model me being a very tall African American female and though those model dreams were dashed,  I never stopped believing in myself.  My vernacular may not be as extensive as some but I never used the word tranny to call someone who dressed other than their gender. The word was always transvestite and my youth spent with transvestites were limited to tv and some news reports.
As I got older, medical science then developed a way for people to change the sex the were born into another one. I knew that as a sex change operation. Again my interaction limited to what i read and news reports.  These days, we seem to feel the need to shorten everything and changes terminologies. Sex change is now transsexual and now it is shorten to tranny which is considered derogatory. 

Carmen Carrera

Carmen Carrera was a contestant on Rupaul’s Drag Race on Logo. He was just a guy who was dressing in drag and then he became transgender.  He is now living his life a female and has become a leader in the transgender community. Now being part of a minority that is consistently ridiculed, mocked and disrespected,  I never realized how bad it was in th transgender community.  I always thought that when someone has a sex change, they wish to live their life as their new sex.  It is up to them to let the world know that they went though their personal life decision.  Rupaul said that he as been a tranny for 32 years and while he has now problem with it, it seems the rest of the world does. Again because I do not travel in those circles, I did not realize the term tranny moved over to represent transsexuals.
It seems Carmen wants everyone to take the term out of their vocabulary and here in lies the problem.  Language is and always gas been a clusterfuck. Some things catch on faster and meanings may change but words are forever.  Trying to change people’s use of word is a war of frivolity. 
I honestly see both sides of the argument but truth be told, I would have not known about Ms.Carrera had she not been on Rupaul’s Drag race.  I am not sure how her popularity would have been had she not been on the show but I feel this could have been a private convo between her and Ru.
When you decide to put your life in the public eye and make announcements as to your life choices, you can’t honestly think that it is just a bubble.  You will always have millions of eyes on you until no one cares anymore. If this is your bread and butter, you will have to take the good with the bad. Hateful and supportive comments. This is the new world we live in children.  I think everyone has offended someone in their life and while it doesn’t make it right, it is gonna happen.
All we can do is educate and hopefully change a few minds.
I do hope that Rupaul and Carmen will work out their differences and as Rupaul says “if you can’t love yourself,  how in the hell can you love somebody else?”

Violation of women because of the power of “no”

I am sure most of you have read about the deadly shooting in Isla Vista and how men and women lost their lives due to someone’s mental instability.  The culture’s name is Elliot Rodger. 

Elliot wrote a manifesto of his entire life from birth till his tragic end. He discussed how up and down his childhood was, the bullying,  his lack of decent interactions with anyone, men and women alike. He goes on to discuss how he became more sheltered and retreated to the online world to socialize. He began to hate men and women in relationships and being happy and how he never experienced that. He expressed how he was attracted to a certain type of women (white women and blonde) and how they never paid attention to him.
One of the saddest part of this he was actually getting help for his mental instability yet people still lost their lives.
The victims have been identified:
Veronika Elizabeth Weiss
Christopher Ross Michaels-Martinez
Weihan Wong
George Chen
Cheng Yuan Hong
Katherine Brennan Cooper
All these people were students at USC with the males being his roomates. They can no longer experience life because someone could not handle theirs.
Unfortunately,  this whole mentality of” the world oweing me something” is not new especially with women.

Countless women have to live in fear of their lives because some men do not respect the power of no.
There is new tumblr page named when women refuse. This page lists the horror stories plus how men feel about rape. Our own government has tried to say there is a difference between rape and justifiable rape. I’m sorry but rape is rape. As soon as you say no and fight back and it continues, it’s rape.
On Twitter,  there a hashtag #yestoallwomen that people can tell more of how they feel in real time. Some men are waking up to the fact that their own mothers, daughters,  sisters, aunts, nieces have at some point been the victim of unwanted harassment or worse.
However, there are still plenty of men out there who cannot respect the power of no from women. Women have to lie about being someone hoping that it will back them off and even then,  there is no guarantee that it will be taken seriously.  I myself have been catcalled and then when I do not respond, immediately I was a bitch. Funny how fast my attractiveness fell huh?
But why should women live in fear? How hard is it actually to respect when a women says no? Why should anyone lose their lives because you feel they should be accepting of your advances? The world doesn’t owe you anything and for guys that feel “see that’s what you women get for friendzoning men”, your mentality is completely fucked up and hope your mom gets to hear how you actually feel about women and give you a good swift kick in your ass.

Godzilla 2014

Oh sorry golden gate, just passing through

I had a family outing and got to see Godzilla after some delicious lobster and scallops and shrimp (sorry it was yummy)
As to not spoil for those who haven’t seen it, I will try not to give away too many of what I feel are key plot points.

2014 Godzilla harkens back to the backstory of Godzilla’s creation. You know all those lovely nuclear test we were running in the 1940s and 50s.

We all know Godzilla beginnings were a man in a rubber suit with forced perspective but the CGI in this version is a mass improvement over the 1998 version and the height and six of the monsters are definitely more believable.
Of course there is a human element and since it takes place on planet earth, I am ok with it. I will admit the human part of the story is a bit cliche but it works for the movie.

We see hints of Godzilla but the king of the monsters does not show up really till mid movie.

Plot itself is dark as are most movies of this genre these days. We are living in a post 9/11 society so most of what occurs makes sense. When you have monsters over 60ft or more fighting in a city, you will have massive building damage and casualties. I know some will say, I go to movies to be entertained but unless it is an action comedy or comedy in general, this is what you will get.
Kind of like how bat man was campy and now he is what was supposed to be. Kinda of the same thing.
Do not forget people, Godzilla is a monster and realistically there is now way to tame or control that force of nature.

I saw the 1998 version and it was definite sign of the times movie, jokes, b.s. relationships and huge product placement.

Some people say that they like the 1998 version better but that should be strictly for nostalgia purposes. One spoiler I will give is Godzilla is not pregnant nor looking for a place to lay eggs. The egg laying occurs from another monster (spoiler 2)

In my humble opinion, Gareth Edwards gave me something to sink my teeth into and enjoy. I have made a promise to never go into any movie with high expectations because sometimes trailers are the best part of the move and every Tom, Dick, Harry and Sarah have to spoil everything for everybody with bullet time opinion ed pieces about  movies. 

For those willing to give Godzilla a chance,  you will enjoy it. You get kaiju fights and destruction and it lends itself to more Godzilla movies just like in the past expect for the creepy twins that call up mothra (shudders)

Let’s have a pity relationship

Good morning world. Hope all is good with you all. Having a conversation With my boyfriend last night brought up a topic I have not thought about in a while.

Pity relationships. Yes you read that correctly.  We live in a world now where everything comes to us fast and furious. We are inundated with images and people of how relationships should be.

But the relationships I am talking about are the average to better. Where you are comfortable.  You do not do above and beyond. You kind of coast. Yeah you cook, remember anniversaries and birthdays and play nice with their friends and family. You start making internal decisions like “I’m getting tired of the game”, “trying on new people to see how they fit me is a chore”, “this person semi gets me and tolerates my b.s. so this should be ok. ”

Now granted,  we have those moments in relationships where this feel less than stellar but that cannot be the everyday feeling. You will start feeling depressed and then everything becomes mundane. Your very existence feels terrible.

But you tolerate this kind of relationship because you have told yourself that you hate dating. The whole game is a farce and this is good enough.

Don’t just do good enough. There are enough downtimes in life than to deal with a constant level of boredom.

I know it is hard but communication is the key and so is honesty. You have to let people know what you want and they in turn.

So many times we want to be mind readers but that is never works. You should never have to settle especially in relationships. This world is too big for you to play the pity party for the next 50 + years.

Scripted reality for your pleasure

Morning good people. Random thought of the day always seems to produce a blog so here goes. As most of you are aware, reality tv is now a staple in out viewing landscape. We the viewers get to see people act foolish or not and have their lives open for the world to see.

Then comes the hammer of the people’ s judgement. This is the proverbial catch-22 where the “stars”(note the quotation marks) then start talking back to the world via Twitter, instagram, Facebook and yadda yadda about how can you judge us. You are seeing what the producers want you to see. Granted, that may be true but only to a certain extent. The behavior that is shown is not something the all of a sudden happened overnight and you all knew the job was dangerous when you took it.

Lets be serious. There is something human nature that love to see people make an ass of themselves.

We can also argue the point of how some of these show a small population of how certain ethnicities act and it is making some ethnicities look bad. Ethnicities do that anyway, tv has just begun to highlight the bad points kinda like how the history we learned school kinda glossed over some bad points but hey, the truth always comes out.

So here is where pot meets kettle. These supposed stars then wanna call out other reality tv stars behavior like their shit doesn’t stink. I guess somehow you forgot what you showed to the world or what your behavior was. Selective memory is a bitch huh?

Then we have the mightier than thou talking about how these shows are affecting the youth of today. So I am going to assume that we will no longer taking responsibility for raising our kids and letting them right from wrong and teaching them about why some people may behave the way they do. It would be great if people would own up to their “fuckery” .

So please don’t be mad when you put our business on front street and got the whole world wagging their tongues about you but you have to stay relevant, right?

The world according the Kanye

Copyright abcnews.com

Morning world and all that Kanye west seems to allow to live in it. So I recently read on my illustrious Facebook feed that Mr. West wants his wife to be the next Coco Chanel.

Pause. Stop.  Looking with my eternal bitchface. Now I am all for one having dreams and aspirations.  Makes sense. Make your self happy by finding your calling but why Kanye are you trying so desperately to shove Kim down everyone’s throat. (Dirty mind has kicked in and stop)

I myself is all for Kim doing what Kim wants to do. What I am suspicious about is why Kanye continues to be her mouth piece (dirty mind stop that).
I have not really seen any article where Kim is actually stating this is her dream.

We have seen her dressed in the best  designer fashion, been a muse for a fashion house and been called fashionable, but let her speak for herself.

It seems the fragile flower that is Kim needs everyone to be speaking for her. She cannot be that vapid where she cannot form sentences, right?

This is one media relationship I have seen where the guy has to change the world’s view of their mate.  There is so much other fuckery going on aka BBWLA, LHHATL and NYC and no one is going around defending their mates behavior.

Sorry to say it but hoes are already housewives so this whole campaign Kanye is doing is a mute point at best.

Just make and produce music Kanye. Prety please with a yeezus cracker on top?

Started from the bottom now we here………… Come on Vogue

As most of the world knows by now , Lady Kim and Sir Kanye have finally gotten a Vogue Cover. Amazing what the American dream can do if you pout and scream enough. 

Most of us know of Kim’s beginnings. Father was a lawyer on the OJ case and she did that now infamous staged sex tape with Brandy’s brother to her two minute marriage to a guy no one can remember.  Her mother then spinned all that around and made her a household where she and her sisters can command hundreds of thousands because everyone wants to to be a part of america’s First TV family. I can only guess most of the youngins that follow Kim have never heard of the Osmonds but I digress. 

Then we have Kanye. A Chicago native producer whose teachers told him he would never make in the music business and slowly began to shove it in everyone’s nose when he made a hit record with an artist. But not to be stopped at production, he wanted to rap to. Got picked up by Roc a Fella records and his career skyrocketed. He unfortunately got into an accident and lost his mom during his career. It seemed that though he valued his life, he began to shove his life in everyone’s face.  All the attention had to be on Kanye. 

These two have had a friendship since  the Reggie Bush days of Kim’s life but I do not think anyone else saw the narcissistic planet that was going to form once they collided. 

Most of us have seen and watched this relationship unfold. The countless pictures of Kim everywhere, the kanye changing of her wardrobe. I do not know why we tried to act surprised when he did this. He did this with Amber Rose. From her blonde locks to being seats away from Pop’s reigning queen Beyonce. 

We have all heard the endless comparisons to Jay and Bey and How Kanye so desperately wanted to Be like Jay. Have to great girl, Great career, Great life. Only problem with that is while it is like pulling teeth to get Jay and Bey to be more open about their relationship ( Though the new Beyonce album to help shed a little more light) , Kanye and Kim want to world to know every single solitary detail. He even hired someone to film his proposal ( For fucks sake).

Now the world’s fashion bible, Vogue, has caved and given her and him a cover. Mr. I need to plead for my girl to be a cover of Vogue. Yes Kim does get great clothes but no she hasn’t done anything to warrant being on something that covers fashion the way fashionistas and wannabe fashionistas love. 

 

Twitter of course was a flutter with a barrage of some really scathing retorts like canceling subscriptions to Vogue going the way of star magazine. Most bloggers and editors alike are trying to figure what made Anna change her mind. We have all heard and read about how much Ms. Wintour did not care for the Kardashians in general so why the change of heart?

 

I have a few theories and it is kinda of how some people raise their children these days because of every level of protection that has to take place. 

1) Kanye threw a tantrum. He went to almost every news and media he could to express how much he loved Kim and why Kim should grace the cover of Vogue and get a star on the Hollywood walk of Fame ( please for the love of god ..no)

2) Anna Wintour killed two birds ( Chicken heads) with one stone. She knows deep in her heart that she would have to appease the beast that is Kimye and what better way to do it

3) Vogue has to sell units. No matter how many purists out there may yell and scream about Vogue’s decision, there are enough Dash Dolls to send this particular issue through the roof.

4) Kimye is creeping away at the 15 minutes of fame. We live in a popcorn society where everything we get is 3 mins of less. And because these to do not follow the less is more policy, they are burning out that flame.

5) Vogue will probably never have them again. Just think long term people. This is a blip on the fashion radar. Their wedding is coming up and everyone is going to capitalize on that ish.

If I were people I wouldn’t worry too much. Fashion magazines stopped really using models since the 90’s and once those two are done with their “issues”, we will find something else to focus on for three minutes. 

I just hope this does not turn into another tomkat relationship. ( Kanye Shrug)

Driver Roll up the Partition…. Please ( Lyrics from Partition from the Beyonce album)

A flurry of thoughts passed through my dome today but my boyfriend and I were talking recently about how sometimes humans always will put people up on pedestals and then want to tear them down. The reason I chose Beyonce is because she is one of the more prominent figures in music today that is currently being scrutinized like the music stars during my growing up years ( the 80’s) .

Beyonce has been criticized for her new album because of explicit visuals and lyrics. A young lady who has been in this industry since the age of 9 and is now a wife and mother has been criticized for showing her post baby body off and somehow is a whore because of her performance at the grammy’s because of performing seductively in her leotard while her husband is a full suit.

Some people claim she has given mothers and women a bad name. But I would love someone to explain to me how an entertainer has given me a bad name. Notice I said Entertainer. Beyonce, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, Ciara, Madonna, Adele, Lorde, Taylor Swift and the like are all entertainers. These women know they audiences that they cater to. If they want to wear booty hugging shorts or ball gowns to perform it is quite within their rights. Art especially music is usually wear people can be expressive whether in lyrics or in clothing changes. The majority of people that go to concerts expect to be entertained and that is what these ladies do….. Entertain!

Now while they may have great causes they support and may be outspoken, why is it not their right to be?

Most of them have Legions of fans who love them no matter what and also have people who can’t stand them. These groups can be so extreme that it makes me wonder sometimes. I love MUSIC… so if any of these women have a song or an album that I enjoy, I will support them. Their personal lives are their own and no matter how much press coverage these ladies may receive, I know I do not know the full picture. I cannot go around making judgement on their lives.

Beyonce is a wife and mom. Fantastic. The pics I see of her and her family when being a family are amazing, Blue seems well taken care off and everyone seems happy. Kudos to her for having her family and living out what seems to be her dream. Kudos to Rihanna and Miley for not giving 2 shits what the world thinks because they are living their lives.

Judge not lest you be judged.

The other thing I cannot truly wrap my head around is the true or not true statements these music artists today may have against each other. Sometimes I read stories about how Someone may not like someone blah blah. Some inside source spreads this. Now whether it is true or not, I don’t care. These people’s rivalries do not pay my bills. For all I know they could have had an off day or someone could have said something off color about another star and they person laughed. This whole pitting women against women is getting really tiresome.

Stop acting like you haven’t done it even when you know it isn’t right but you laugh or agree in that moment. It really doesn’t seems that any of these ladies are hurting in their pocketbooks and if we mothers and women are so concerned about these ladies being role models, maybe you should talk to your children. ( Novel Concept right). When I was growing up watching Like a virgin by madonna, or any of Janet jackson’s videos, it didn’t make me want to go out have sex with every guy I saw or start acting like a whore. Even when Madonna released a SEX book and did all kind of debauchery, my mom talk to me and explained she is living her life and if she chooses to do that, it is all on her.

Also now because these people are huge stars, there must be some invisible hand guiding them. REALLY!?!?!?!?! I guess somehow you forgot that you bought the cd, the hat, the t-shirt and such. You helped build this person dream and they are showing appreciation by performing for you and giving you a show. Sometimes, it is ok to take things at face value. Sometimes we do not have to look deeper when there is no reason to.

1-18-14…………. Playing Catch up

Morning Good People.  Hope your January  is going well.  So far, my January is going fairly well. I have made a budget I can live with.  I bought myself a planner , wrote down when bills need to be paid and how much I need to save every month.  I am really retraining my brain and behavior this month to set the trend for the year.

retrain

It is going to be hard because I am queen procrastinator. So I need to refocus and regroup. I also made a decision to go into business with my sis and We are going to start in April. That will be our fiscal year. I am excited and scared which means it is a good thing.

We are both excited and I cant wait to really get started .. BUt sis has a few bills to pay so I am gonna do that first and then business planning.

This is going to be awesome.

Peace out

1-09-2014———- The price of Fame… Yes that old Chestnut

Evening good people. I hope all is well in your world. This particular topic has been buzzing in my head for days and though it has been talked about before, I am going to throw my hat into the ring.

 

 

Today in this 30 Sec marketplace we call fame, it seems the expectations of those to stay “Relevant” is a hard road.
They have fans to appease or not, things to make them stay note worthy and somehow live a life.

Being a user of social media, I have seen some of the worst behavior from the keyboard warriors and screen protectors. These people have opinions on how these people should live their lives or how they are living their lies till, begging for love from celebrities and then breaking down every aspect of the entertainer so somehow this makes them feel better.

I wish could understand when people actually forgot the saying ” Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one” Please tell me how these people who most if not all times have worked hard for their status in their craft ( Singing, dancing, acting, sports, artistry) yet when they reach a certain status which BTW these keyboard warriors and screen protectors put there now feel the need to tear these people down.

We all have flaws. None of us are perfect so why it is we demand perfection from these people? Past performance does not dictate future returns.

I have read some seriously horrible things about people in entertainment from the illuminati is blessing some to people saying people relationships are fake to worrying about people’s hair to what people name their children to the fact they may have a lazy eye.

Now while I have verbally made an opinion of certain things I would not take time to post them. I know what it like to be gawked at and made fun of and I am by no means famous so I can only fathom what it must be like to under a microscope by the general public.

Why are we so happy to tear people down that we put up on pedestals? These people want you to respect their craft and hopefully enjoy but why when they have a bad day, all of a sudden they are a major disappointment.

And can someone please explain the illuminati to me without sounding like a raving lunatic? I have heard of this invisible hand or organization of pushing certain people to the forefront so we focus purely on them. If that is a case they are surely doing a piss poor job because for every article about Beyonce, Kimye, Lebron, Dwayne wade and or who ever they wish to deem flavor of the moment, there are plenty of articles of underground artists and players that people are making sure you find out about.

We all know how powerful word of mouth is but stop trying to purposely derail someone’s time. Everyone has their moment to shine I mean really shine. Why can’t we be happy that they worked hard and they did what they had to do.

Now I will admit their are plenty of random people in entertainment and we all know how they got their but you really can’t knock the hustle that keeps them there.

Anyhoo, I said my two cents .

Peace.