The power of words

I recently came across a debate on the use of the derogatory term” tranny” between RuPaul and a now transgender Carmen Carrera.
I will now show my ignorance because I am not afraid to be a fool.

RuPaul

I grew up seeing Rupaul as this gorgeous model that was tall and had a wonderful figure. He made the song  supermodel and made me believe I could be a model me being a very tall African American female and though those model dreams were dashed,  I never stopped believing in myself.  My vernacular may not be as extensive as some but I never used the word tranny to call someone who dressed other than their gender. The word was always transvestite and my youth spent with transvestites were limited to tv and some news reports.
As I got older, medical science then developed a way for people to change the sex the were born into another one. I knew that as a sex change operation. Again my interaction limited to what i read and news reports.  These days, we seem to feel the need to shorten everything and changes terminologies. Sex change is now transsexual and now it is shorten to tranny which is considered derogatory. 

Carmen Carrera

Carmen Carrera was a contestant on Rupaul’s Drag Race on Logo. He was just a guy who was dressing in drag and then he became transgender.  He is now living his life a female and has become a leader in the transgender community. Now being part of a minority that is consistently ridiculed, mocked and disrespected,  I never realized how bad it was in th transgender community.  I always thought that when someone has a sex change, they wish to live their life as their new sex.  It is up to them to let the world know that they went though their personal life decision.  Rupaul said that he as been a tranny for 32 years and while he has now problem with it, it seems the rest of the world does. Again because I do not travel in those circles, I did not realize the term tranny moved over to represent transsexuals.
It seems Carmen wants everyone to take the term out of their vocabulary and here in lies the problem.  Language is and always gas been a clusterfuck. Some things catch on faster and meanings may change but words are forever.  Trying to change people’s use of word is a war of frivolity. 
I honestly see both sides of the argument but truth be told, I would have not known about Ms.Carrera had she not been on Rupaul’s Drag race.  I am not sure how her popularity would have been had she not been on the show but I feel this could have been a private convo between her and Ru.
When you decide to put your life in the public eye and make announcements as to your life choices, you can’t honestly think that it is just a bubble.  You will always have millions of eyes on you until no one cares anymore. If this is your bread and butter, you will have to take the good with the bad. Hateful and supportive comments. This is the new world we live in children.  I think everyone has offended someone in their life and while it doesn’t make it right, it is gonna happen.
All we can do is educate and hopefully change a few minds.
I do hope that Rupaul and Carmen will work out their differences and as Rupaul says “if you can’t love yourself,  how in the hell can you love somebody else?”

Scripted reality for your pleasure

Morning good people. Random thought of the day always seems to produce a blog so here goes. As most of you are aware, reality tv is now a staple in out viewing landscape. We the viewers get to see people act foolish or not and have their lives open for the world to see.

Then comes the hammer of the people’ s judgement. This is the proverbial catch-22 where the “stars”(note the quotation marks) then start talking back to the world via Twitter, instagram, Facebook and yadda yadda about how can you judge us. You are seeing what the producers want you to see. Granted, that may be true but only to a certain extent. The behavior that is shown is not something the all of a sudden happened overnight and you all knew the job was dangerous when you took it.

Lets be serious. There is something human nature that love to see people make an ass of themselves.

We can also argue the point of how some of these show a small population of how certain ethnicities act and it is making some ethnicities look bad. Ethnicities do that anyway, tv has just begun to highlight the bad points kinda like how the history we learned school kinda glossed over some bad points but hey, the truth always comes out.

So here is where pot meets kettle. These supposed stars then wanna call out other reality tv stars behavior like their shit doesn’t stink. I guess somehow you forgot what you showed to the world or what your behavior was. Selective memory is a bitch huh?

Then we have the mightier than thou talking about how these shows are affecting the youth of today. So I am going to assume that we will no longer taking responsibility for raising our kids and letting them right from wrong and teaching them about why some people may behave the way they do. It would be great if people would own up to their “fuckery” .

So please don’t be mad when you put our business on front street and got the whole world wagging their tongues about you but you have to stay relevant, right?

The world according the Kanye

Copyright abcnews.com

Morning world and all that Kanye west seems to allow to live in it. So I recently read on my illustrious Facebook feed that Mr. West wants his wife to be the next Coco Chanel.

Pause. Stop.  Looking with my eternal bitchface. Now I am all for one having dreams and aspirations.  Makes sense. Make your self happy by finding your calling but why Kanye are you trying so desperately to shove Kim down everyone’s throat. (Dirty mind has kicked in and stop)

I myself is all for Kim doing what Kim wants to do. What I am suspicious about is why Kanye continues to be her mouth piece (dirty mind stop that).
I have not really seen any article where Kim is actually stating this is her dream.

We have seen her dressed in the best  designer fashion, been a muse for a fashion house and been called fashionable, but let her speak for herself.

It seems the fragile flower that is Kim needs everyone to be speaking for her. She cannot be that vapid where she cannot form sentences, right?

This is one media relationship I have seen where the guy has to change the world’s view of their mate.  There is so much other fuckery going on aka BBWLA, LHHATL and NYC and no one is going around defending their mates behavior.

Sorry to say it but hoes are already housewives so this whole campaign Kanye is doing is a mute point at best.

Just make and produce music Kanye. Prety please with a yeezus cracker on top?

Driver Roll up the Partition…. Please ( Lyrics from Partition from the Beyonce album)

A flurry of thoughts passed through my dome today but my boyfriend and I were talking recently about how sometimes humans always will put people up on pedestals and then want to tear them down. The reason I chose Beyonce is because she is one of the more prominent figures in music today that is currently being scrutinized like the music stars during my growing up years ( the 80’s) .

Beyonce has been criticized for her new album because of explicit visuals and lyrics. A young lady who has been in this industry since the age of 9 and is now a wife and mother has been criticized for showing her post baby body off and somehow is a whore because of her performance at the grammy’s because of performing seductively in her leotard while her husband is a full suit.

Some people claim she has given mothers and women a bad name. But I would love someone to explain to me how an entertainer has given me a bad name. Notice I said Entertainer. Beyonce, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, Ciara, Madonna, Adele, Lorde, Taylor Swift and the like are all entertainers. These women know they audiences that they cater to. If they want to wear booty hugging shorts or ball gowns to perform it is quite within their rights. Art especially music is usually wear people can be expressive whether in lyrics or in clothing changes. The majority of people that go to concerts expect to be entertained and that is what these ladies do….. Entertain!

Now while they may have great causes they support and may be outspoken, why is it not their right to be?

Most of them have Legions of fans who love them no matter what and also have people who can’t stand them. These groups can be so extreme that it makes me wonder sometimes. I love MUSIC… so if any of these women have a song or an album that I enjoy, I will support them. Their personal lives are their own and no matter how much press coverage these ladies may receive, I know I do not know the full picture. I cannot go around making judgement on their lives.

Beyonce is a wife and mom. Fantastic. The pics I see of her and her family when being a family are amazing, Blue seems well taken care off and everyone seems happy. Kudos to her for having her family and living out what seems to be her dream. Kudos to Rihanna and Miley for not giving 2 shits what the world thinks because they are living their lives.

Judge not lest you be judged.

The other thing I cannot truly wrap my head around is the true or not true statements these music artists today may have against each other. Sometimes I read stories about how Someone may not like someone blah blah. Some inside source spreads this. Now whether it is true or not, I don’t care. These people’s rivalries do not pay my bills. For all I know they could have had an off day or someone could have said something off color about another star and they person laughed. This whole pitting women against women is getting really tiresome.

Stop acting like you haven’t done it even when you know it isn’t right but you laugh or agree in that moment. It really doesn’t seems that any of these ladies are hurting in their pocketbooks and if we mothers and women are so concerned about these ladies being role models, maybe you should talk to your children. ( Novel Concept right). When I was growing up watching Like a virgin by madonna, or any of Janet jackson’s videos, it didn’t make me want to go out have sex with every guy I saw or start acting like a whore. Even when Madonna released a SEX book and did all kind of debauchery, my mom talk to me and explained she is living her life and if she chooses to do that, it is all on her.

Also now because these people are huge stars, there must be some invisible hand guiding them. REALLY!?!?!?!?! I guess somehow you forgot that you bought the cd, the hat, the t-shirt and such. You helped build this person dream and they are showing appreciation by performing for you and giving you a show. Sometimes, it is ok to take things at face value. Sometimes we do not have to look deeper when there is no reason to.

1-09-2014———- The price of Fame… Yes that old Chestnut

Evening good people. I hope all is well in your world. This particular topic has been buzzing in my head for days and though it has been talked about before, I am going to throw my hat into the ring.

 

 

Today in this 30 Sec marketplace we call fame, it seems the expectations of those to stay “Relevant” is a hard road.
They have fans to appease or not, things to make them stay note worthy and somehow live a life.

Being a user of social media, I have seen some of the worst behavior from the keyboard warriors and screen protectors. These people have opinions on how these people should live their lives or how they are living their lies till, begging for love from celebrities and then breaking down every aspect of the entertainer so somehow this makes them feel better.

I wish could understand when people actually forgot the saying ” Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one” Please tell me how these people who most if not all times have worked hard for their status in their craft ( Singing, dancing, acting, sports, artistry) yet when they reach a certain status which BTW these keyboard warriors and screen protectors put there now feel the need to tear these people down.

We all have flaws. None of us are perfect so why it is we demand perfection from these people? Past performance does not dictate future returns.

I have read some seriously horrible things about people in entertainment from the illuminati is blessing some to people saying people relationships are fake to worrying about people’s hair to what people name their children to the fact they may have a lazy eye.

Now while I have verbally made an opinion of certain things I would not take time to post them. I know what it like to be gawked at and made fun of and I am by no means famous so I can only fathom what it must be like to under a microscope by the general public.

Why are we so happy to tear people down that we put up on pedestals? These people want you to respect their craft and hopefully enjoy but why when they have a bad day, all of a sudden they are a major disappointment.

And can someone please explain the illuminati to me without sounding like a raving lunatic? I have heard of this invisible hand or organization of pushing certain people to the forefront so we focus purely on them. If that is a case they are surely doing a piss poor job because for every article about Beyonce, Kimye, Lebron, Dwayne wade and or who ever they wish to deem flavor of the moment, there are plenty of articles of underground artists and players that people are making sure you find out about.

We all know how powerful word of mouth is but stop trying to purposely derail someone’s time. Everyone has their moment to shine I mean really shine. Why can’t we be happy that they worked hard and they did what they had to do.

Now I will admit their are plenty of random people in entertainment and we all know how they got their but you really can’t knock the hustle that keeps them there.

Anyhoo, I said my two cents .

Peace.

1-7-2014 ………. Expressions

Hey good people who might be reading this. Today was day of expressions. More specifically , Facial expressions. I work in retail ( much to the chagrin of my mom) and I get to experience more facial expressions everyday.

Faces

Today was a bit different because people seemed a bit happier. I know most of you have heard or read about this polar effect  that  is sweeping the United States and dropping into some dangerously cold temperatures.

Today in my part of the Midwest ( also known as Omaha, Nebraska) we had some relief. SOme people who walked in were downright happy that the temp was in the teens rather than negative shenanigans.  I was greeted today with smiles and some really open people. I will say Midwesterns that i have met so far have been very open and polite… But remember I am a slightly jaded NYorker so this is kinda new.

Of course I did have my non responsive and downright rude customers but in the service industry , it can’t be helped. Either you pissed them off or they are having a really bad day and feel the need to take it out on you. I used to get upset but working in retail gives you the thickest skin on the planet.

I took these peeps with a grain of salt. That doesn’t affect me nor did I give them bad service. MY mama raised me right! ( thanks mom)

This is actually the part of the job I truly like… The people watching.  Sometimes you may never see these people again or maybe they will just come back because they like dealing with you.

All in how you treat em I supposed.

Anyhoo stay Golden

No matter how much some things change, most of the time it will stay the same

Well I am sure most of you know the verdict that was handed down recently between Trayvon Martin and George Zimmerman. The reason why it took me so long to write about it is because there are many voices about this particular verdict and how it was handled.

Mr. Zimmerman got off by the letter of the law and though it was not justice for the Martin family, it did show how much proof you need in order to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you broke the law.

This just makes the case even more sad. A young man lost his life at the hands of a man who was warned on 2 occasions not to follow him. It almost seemed as if the universe was warning Mr. Zimmerman that this would not go well for him and now it hasn’t.

His family is now worried that some vigilante will come after him. Truth of the matter is, no one will want to touch George Zimmerman. His actions have now set in motion a huge set of events for him, his family and everyone that defended him. His name will go down in infamy and in this day of social media, it will not be forgotten.

Many people wish to play the race card and though it is part of it, it is not the main fact. The fact is someone was murdered. Can we as people comprehend that? A young man was murdered. He was coming home and defended himself against a man who clearly was itching to murder someone or else why would he have had a gun and bullet chambered? Anyone could have died that night and we lost a young man.

The media now wishes to murder Trayvon further by slandering him with allegations of theft and wrongdoing. A young man died. He did not rob the place he purchased his skittles and Arizona ice tea.

The black community is up in arms and are figuring what is the best course of action to take. Realize that this case is a wake up call for everything wrong with what we take for granted. When it is black on black crime, we do not bat and eyelash. But that is because as community, we are used to use murdering each other over the most base of things. It doesn’t blip on our radar or our country’s radar when minorities hurt each other. We expect the same treatment when it happens to a person of a different skin tone hurting someone else of another skin tone. WE ARE ALL PART OF THE HUMAN RACE. We need to remember that.

When actually start valuing all human life maybe a we can get a some things fixed.

Whatever people wish to do Florida, they really should do the whole country. Every state has had these same cases and we have yet to boycott any other state.

Just my Two cents

It’s in your nature to destroy yourselves

As I am sure most of you know  by now, the tragedy at the Boston Marathon. 3 explosions while the marathon was going on. 

So world or better yet, Humanity WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!?!??!

1st, we have to deal with a petulant child in North Korea threatening the United States and now someone decides that during a marathon which I learned was in remembrance of what happened in Newtown is now marred with explosions and loss of life.

Will someone please take the time to explain what is going on? I know we are supposed to have  evil in the world. It is the only way the world can be balanced but why are we so eager for the world to burn?

Are we dissatisfied with the world not ending? Are we so bored with our existence that we feel the need to end everyone else’s???? I can no longer accept being crazy as a valid excuse for everything that happens today. People are entirely too calculating and know exactly what they are doing. We just know how to get around the system by pleading insanity. There seem to be so many that want to leave their evil mark .

 

This world has no reset button. 

The New World ORDER…. or at least in my mind..

Today I woke and of course turned on the television. I was channeling surfing when I landed on MTV. Now before anyone says anything, I will say it MTV NO LONGER PLAYS MUSIC ( it’s first mistake) but it was a show I actually enjoy called True Life. Today’s episode was ” I cannot please my parents”. Today’s they showed the lives of 2 different young men who lived in different parts of California. One lived in Beverly Hills with his Persian parents  and the other who lives with his Hispanic mother. I am telling you the ethnic background because this is how it was edited to the viewing public.  The young men each had dreams and goals they wished to accomplish. One wanted to publish his book about being Persian and the other wanted to become a DJ.

Both these young men lived with their parents which wasn’t the issue. The issue is that both sets of parents did not allow their children to live their dreams. I thought it was odd because both parents came to ” Land of Opportunity” which is supposed to be America and to an extent still is.

 

The Hispanic mom wanted her oldest to go to college. She raised 7 children by working in a bank and giving the best life she could. All of the other children have gone to college but the oldest got his girlfriend pregnant at 18 ( which was the same age his mom had him) and he does not have a steady job. He has a production company with his friend to produce music and he Dj’s occasionally. Occasionally being the operative word.  His grip was that his mother doesn’t understand his dream and his mom is basically telling him everyone has dreams but you have a family you need to take care of.  The reason why this young man pissed me off is because he is acting truly ignorant to how dire his situation is.  You are so busy wanting to fulfill your dream that you are not building marketable skills.  There are so many people who are working till their actual dream gets going. That is the adult thing to do and then the fact that he has a child, DUDE…… REALLY!!!?????!?!?! WTF . He reminded of an ex of mine who had dreams of becoming a big time fashion photographer and never wanted to work a day in his life and pretended like he wasn’t a father and did not have responsibilities.  And to top it off, his girlfriend, him and his child are all living in his mother’s house and he doesn’t have a car so his younger brother has to drive him around.   All he can think about is DJing and music.  Sorry Bro but you have bigger realities than you want to face.

 

The Persian man lives with his parents who have a very comfortable life and want to make sure his life has guaranteed comfort as well . His heart however is in writing and it seems to be in the satirical format. He has titled his book ” I used to be Persian”. This was a huge chagrin to his parents who almost died a small death from title to reading to the eventual book cover.  The issue that bothered me was his mom invading his privacy and calling his best friends to tell him no to publish the book.  Insane right?? I never understand why people never take the problem to the source. Talk to your son not his friends. They can’t control him as it seems as much as she can’t. What I appreciated about him though as that he stood by his convictions and moved out his parents house. He was afraid of being disowned but at the same time , he wanted to live his dream.

In this new millennium, most of us are drowning in debt ( educational or consumer). We cant find the jobs we need to in order to survive. We all have to be working no matter where we live.  But no matter what we still have to go after our dreams no matter how long it takes.  We are so inundated with celebrities and their big houses and such and we only know some stories about the struggles.

 

Life is a struggle. Not every we get will be easy. We have to work for it. The best thing is take the realities you face as what they are. You know you have bills and you know you have to live but if you want something bad enough , you will take the good with the bad till your dreams have manifested the way you want them too.

Protect and Serve… Yourself

I have noticed as of late that sometimes being strong is not so great. When you are your weakest moments, no one is around to help you because they think you are strong enough to get through it.

That double edge sword is a bitch. Reaching out to people is already a vulnerable position but to be shunned and not acknowledged hurts deeper than any cut that could ever be inflicted.

Basically people are telling you they don’t care and you are nothing to them. Now while that may not be the mentality, it is how it feels to the person being neglected.

What you can do in these situations are:

1) Take 5 deep breaths

2) Primal scream

3) Cry till your eyes are dry

4) Write down your thoughts

5) Find that one you trust and let them know.

When you are down, people will show that they care so move your focus from one person. Your network of caring people is probably bigger than the ones we always focus on . Open your eyes to your entire world.

Have a great day loves!!!